Away From Her

I really like having my blog.  It allows me a forum to process and work through life.  It's a safe place to write about what's on my mind.  Some of my friends have suggested that it's depressing and that I really shouldn't share this stuff with others.  I have always been an open book though and I don't mind if someone else is reading what I'm thinking.  No one is cheerful and happy 100% of the time.  If someone doesn't like what I write about then they don't really like me because my thoughts are part of what make me who I am.  I would hope that my friends would appreciate me for all my facets.

 

Last night I went to the Toronto Film Festival and I saw 'Away From Her'.  Although it was based on a short story by Alice Munro it had been adapted to screenplay by Sarah Polley and she also directed it. The movie starred Gordon Pinsent, Julie Christie and Olympia Dukakis.  This movie was phenomenal.  It was well written, directed and acted. I cannot say enough good things about it.  What a fantastic directorial debut for Sarah Polley.

 

The movie is about a retired couple, Grant and Fiona.  The film starts out with the early signs that Fiona is developing early onset of Alzheimers.  Together they decide that she needs to be admitted to a nursing facility.  Grant is heavily conflicted especially when he learns that once she is admitted he is not allowed to visit her for 30 days.  After 30 days has passed Grant learns that Fiona doesn't really know him and has developed a romantic attachment to another male patient called Aubrey. 

 

This movie was so poignant and sad.  I cannot imagine having my spouse not only not know me but fall in love with someone else.  That has got to be one of the hardest things to endure.  However, Grant in the movie does as well as one can in that situation.  It made me very grateful that my Grandparents have not developed Alzheimers. 

 

It really made me think hard about love and marriage.  I have a pretty good idea of the level of commitment one assumes when they get married but that movie REALLY makes you understand what it means.  When you say in sickness and health you are saying I'll love you forever and be there forever even if you don't know me anymore.  I wonder how many people really think about it before they get married.  By the rate of divorce out there I'd say not many.

 

Relationships of any kind have always been important to me.  I've always made an effort to maintain them. Sometimes I'm the only one trying but I don't give up easily.  I believe that the people in our lives are the most important thing. If you don't have your friends and family there is no material possession that will fill that void.

 

Marriage is hard work, this I know. But I'm finally at the point in my life where I would be able to accept a responsibility of that magnitude.  It doesn't scare me and I don't see it as restricting.  I'm ready to invest myself into a relationship like that. It's another part of life's great adventure and that is always something to look forward to.